Kay -N- Kay

This picture singlehandedly captures why non-SUV drivers hate people who drive SUVs.

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If you drive an SUV, you probably think it’s because a Hummer takes up two parking spaces.  But hey, you drive an Explorer so why is that guy frowning up at you?

Those of you who know me, know I utter this phrase somewhat regularly.  Most often when I am driving in the car, maneuvering through the throngs of inhumanity.  Today, I’m not sure if the person I hate more is the audacious ariline passenger or myself.

I spent probably 20 to 30 visits to Northwest’s web site, adeptly maneuvering my seating assignment for the lengthy trip I had to fly.  Starting with a middle seat at the back of the airplane, I worked my up through successive visits closer to the front, then a window seat, finally arriving at me destination… a precious aisle seat just behind the exit row.

All was good, until I walked up to my seat to find this stranger sitting in my seat, looking up at me… expectantly… hopefully.  He and his ugly wife, girlfriend, or whatever seated next him, stumbled over each other to talk at once.  I don’t know exactly what came out of their stupid mouths, but it amounted to asking me to switch seats with him, so they could sit together.

Here is where I hate myself… caught off guard, wanting to be friendly, I agreed.  I half-knew that I was consigning myself to a middle seat, but it didn’t fully register until my own stupid mouth had already agreed.

What I should have said was, “Are you serious?  You want me to give you my aisle seat for your middle seat?  Really?  Next to the 400 lbs woman right there who is spilling over the arm rest and who will force me to sit with arm at a 45 degree angle across my body for the next 4 hours?  Just so you two can sit together?  You really can’t be separated by the 8 feet distance that exists between her seat and your own assigned seat?”

Yeah, that would’ve been grand.

I hate people.